I have rarely been friendless. My life has been dotted with friends, in a way, that keeping 'FRIENDS' on Y-Axis and 'YEAR' on X axis, joining the dots would give you a flight of stairs. This stair upwards is a reflection of my evolution into the person I am today. And I like to believe that each of those friends have contributed.
Even if there were heart breaks and betrayals, even if I no longer speak to them. They will always be significant towards shaping my life because those dots cannot be erased.
In retrospect, I realise that I have been very fierce as a friend. I have harboured extreme emotions and often my 'friends' have found it difficult to handle. Hence, many left failing to identify with my obsession with the relationship.
Today, I have this tiny group of friends, a couple of them sporadically located here and there across the country, some who have managed to survive this obsession and others who have embraced the madness.
Every friendship for me was for life. So, I ended up imposing my feelings and expected them to reciprocate, with an identical fierceness, in the absence of which I have felt dejected.
But, having lived 23 years of my unexpectedly eventful life, I wonder what I would I have done without all of you.
I know, wishing friends on a particular day is a cliche, but I am a fan of all cliches.
Most of the friends that I have today have come to develop dual identities.
A sister became a friend about 18 years ago, when I held her in my arms in a hospital ward. The memory has been recreated with the tales that I have heard over the years. Sometimes, I do wish I could remember the day exactly the way it happened but as this friendship strengthened, I have come to like this recreated version, making it dearer to me more than ever.
Then, there were friends who turned into sisters and a nephew became a friend. Meanwhile, bosses and colleagues became amiable. Friendship also gave me the person I would spend the rest of my life with.
I have inadvertently been part of trios, at school, in colleges.
Trio 1: Two girls from my days at coaching for engineering, which all three of us miserably failed at, made the failure so much easier to survive. Incompetence in a common subject was perhaps what united us.
Trio 2: We started off as a pair actually. Picking up t-shirts from the men's section, we loved to walk the streets of Kolkata in our sneakers with a backpack dangling over our backs. We were cool! Really cool! Then came along this third one. Slow, feminine but extremely talented lady-like classmate of ours. We wonder till date, how we came to become friends with this 'misfit'.
This a non-trio mention. She was not a part of any group for she was not meant to be shared. Kolkata wouldn't have been the 'City of Joy' for me had it not been for her. She was my mother, my sister and my friend all clubbed into one, for the three years in the city. She was my shoulder to cry on and my trove of happiness.
Trio 3: One of them became my partner for life. The other partner in crime. Frankly, I cannot remember the story of how the three of us came together. The brightest of the guys in our class and the most awesome (she likes it if you use the adjective for her) of the girls were my friends. I was sheer lucky, I suppose.
Here, I would like to make three more non-trio mentions.
This guy was my first friend in Dhenkanal. This obscure little place in the state of Odisha, became home as I took morning walks with him. He turned an anxious evening into a 'date' over gupchups and chaat. Today, we strangle each other and hurl abuses. But, he continues to remain close to my heart.
And another one, slightly older to me. My life would be nothing like what it is today, had he not said, "Bachhe!" and given me the best advice that I have ever received and I will be forever grateful to him.
In Dhenkanal, I also came across a man, who inspired me like never before; a teacher who had the capacity to transform a divided class room into a united newsroom; who was and will always remain our Captain!
I have also sought a friend in a brother/nephew. We have met what, three times? But, we have spoken for hours. He is the one who calls me half past midnight on my birthdays, just so we can talk uninterrupted and I? I forget to wish him when he turns 28? 29, I think.
It is said workplaces are not very friendly places. But, mine has given me some keepers.
Two madcaps - a dance partner and a Haryanvi dude.
A boss who is not bossy, who makes me want to go to work and a colleague stationed across the glass wall, who says I am her favourite.
Last night I wished some of them a happy friendship day. One kissed me. She was lying beside me. One wished me back. One was amused. She sent back an 'LOL' for obvious reasons. And one asked me why I wished him, perhaps because we share a bond that encompasses emotions more than just being friends.
I said, "Are we not friends? Kuch bhi ho jaye, doston ki jagah hamesha alag hi hoti hai."
Even if there were heart breaks and betrayals, even if I no longer speak to them. They will always be significant towards shaping my life because those dots cannot be erased.
In retrospect, I realise that I have been very fierce as a friend. I have harboured extreme emotions and often my 'friends' have found it difficult to handle. Hence, many left failing to identify with my obsession with the relationship.
Today, I have this tiny group of friends, a couple of them sporadically located here and there across the country, some who have managed to survive this obsession and others who have embraced the madness.
Every friendship for me was for life. So, I ended up imposing my feelings and expected them to reciprocate, with an identical fierceness, in the absence of which I have felt dejected.
But, having lived 23 years of my unexpectedly eventful life, I wonder what I would I have done without all of you.
I know, wishing friends on a particular day is a cliche, but I am a fan of all cliches.
Most of the friends that I have today have come to develop dual identities.
A sister became a friend about 18 years ago, when I held her in my arms in a hospital ward. The memory has been recreated with the tales that I have heard over the years. Sometimes, I do wish I could remember the day exactly the way it happened but as this friendship strengthened, I have come to like this recreated version, making it dearer to me more than ever.
Then, there were friends who turned into sisters and a nephew became a friend. Meanwhile, bosses and colleagues became amiable. Friendship also gave me the person I would spend the rest of my life with.
I have inadvertently been part of trios, at school, in colleges.
Trio 1: Two girls from my days at coaching for engineering, which all three of us miserably failed at, made the failure so much easier to survive. Incompetence in a common subject was perhaps what united us.
Trio 2: We started off as a pair actually. Picking up t-shirts from the men's section, we loved to walk the streets of Kolkata in our sneakers with a backpack dangling over our backs. We were cool! Really cool! Then came along this third one. Slow, feminine but extremely talented lady-like classmate of ours. We wonder till date, how we came to become friends with this 'misfit'.
This a non-trio mention. She was not a part of any group for she was not meant to be shared. Kolkata wouldn't have been the 'City of Joy' for me had it not been for her. She was my mother, my sister and my friend all clubbed into one, for the three years in the city. She was my shoulder to cry on and my trove of happiness.
Trio 3: One of them became my partner for life. The other partner in crime. Frankly, I cannot remember the story of how the three of us came together. The brightest of the guys in our class and the most awesome (she likes it if you use the adjective for her) of the girls were my friends. I was sheer lucky, I suppose.
Here, I would like to make three more non-trio mentions.
This guy was my first friend in Dhenkanal. This obscure little place in the state of Odisha, became home as I took morning walks with him. He turned an anxious evening into a 'date' over gupchups and chaat. Today, we strangle each other and hurl abuses. But, he continues to remain close to my heart.
And another one, slightly older to me. My life would be nothing like what it is today, had he not said, "Bachhe!" and given me the best advice that I have ever received and I will be forever grateful to him.
In Dhenkanal, I also came across a man, who inspired me like never before; a teacher who had the capacity to transform a divided class room into a united newsroom; who was and will always remain our Captain!
I have also sought a friend in a brother/nephew. We have met what, three times? But, we have spoken for hours. He is the one who calls me half past midnight on my birthdays, just so we can talk uninterrupted and I? I forget to wish him when he turns 28? 29, I think.
It is said workplaces are not very friendly places. But, mine has given me some keepers.
Two madcaps - a dance partner and a Haryanvi dude.
A boss who is not bossy, who makes me want to go to work and a colleague stationed across the glass wall, who says I am her favourite.
Last night I wished some of them a happy friendship day. One kissed me. She was lying beside me. One wished me back. One was amused. She sent back an 'LOL' for obvious reasons. And one asked me why I wished him, perhaps because we share a bond that encompasses emotions more than just being friends.
I said, "Are we not friends? Kuch bhi ho jaye, doston ki jagah hamesha alag hi hoti hai."
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